first, light.

Is this dreamy or is this dreamy?
The slight chaos that is over taken by a reassuring, soul soothing feeling of calm with the morning mist and the dog, the big white home, fresh chopped wood and rambling arrangement of warm peach & pinks.

Inspired to make my own.

Photos: Sarah Ryhanen of SAIPUA

she got game

 

This was a look behind the scenes of Tim Ashton shooting an exclusive for Fashion Gone Rogue.

He has an eye for clean lines, ridiculously great light, shape & colour. He takes chaos and simplifies it in a way my mind sometimes can't even comprehend. He's pretty handsome and wants me to be on all of his shoots. I think we both scored.

x

Photos: Behind the scenes by Rachel Kara.
'She Got Game' by Tim Ashton for Fashion Gone Rogue feat Melissa Bell & Katherina Webster. Hair Luke Davis Makeup Desiree Wise Stylist Monique Moynihan

for me

The year has begun and I am still not quite settled but I am most certainly trying. 

The whole fireworked up celebratory eve may come and go with little to no effect so can be easy to skim over, but I'm seeing and learning how important the cycle of a new year is to human endeavor (the broadest, most appropriate term I could think of, sorry). I think we need these markers. A chance to stop, reflect, reevaluate and go marching forward with fresh vigour and motivation. Heres what I've been thinking about:

1. Follow through. I think I've always been bad with this. I like to start projects and tire of them very easily. I get bored. I skim many surfaces. I absorb enough information to feign knowledge very quickly so can move on very quickly. I have new ideas that are better and fresher than my current unfinished one. I get restless. I find it almost physically impossible sometimes to stick with what I am doing. Around the house I am known to leave cupboard doors & drawers open, socks in the laundry basket when hanging the washing out and the last few dirty plates beside a full sink of hot water. 

Its normal for me to have 13 tabs open - a few with images waiting to be saved, emails to be completed and surely a few draft blog posts waiting for the attention they deserve.

I am known for not replying to text messages. 

So...I'm not looking to slow down my mind or stop it looking for the next thing but I  do need to make conscious efforts to finish things off. Starting with the everyday tasks which will naturally progress to the more path & life changing projects. 

2. Worry. When looking back on 2012 I realised a lot of my memory was jaded with worry. Usually money related. On the first of January my love was laying in bed with me as I came to this realisation and pointed out that I had made it until now paying for everything I need (and a lot more) and without my worry I still would have ended up at the same point but with a less furrowed brow and more joyful memories of my working weeks. 

So...this year I will not waste my energy worrying. I will focus, see work come and the finance will follow and I'll live to tell a greater tale come 2014. 

which brings me to...

3. Focus. I do a lot. I try to do a lot. I spent early mornings and late nights and weekends at my computer last year. I had up to 3 rather irregular part time jobs that I let take up all my 'free' hours to supplement my income from photography which was somewhat neglected probably because of said jobs. Going to work ended up being counterproductive. The time that I had 'off' was plagued with backlogs of unedited photos and guilt. I look back and see it's a vicious cycle.  I was never disconnected from what I wanted which was making me anxious, rather than driven, with each new day that I didn't achieve what I wanted. I am the type that feeds off positive energy & feedback and so with each moment of disappointment in myself I probably sunk a little further back. I mean, I wasn't miserable...and yes there were moments of true glory in what I just made sound like gloom but I guess I do just want a lot and can get a little impatient with the rate at which life moves!  So...I am streamlining my part time work to 1 job, 2 (and a half) days a week - what I need to pay rent & bills. The rest is for photos. I don't want to just take what photography jobs come, I am defining my vision and going after it. I will be committed to my dream and flexible to fit in with the unexpected ways in which life may present it. 

And one day selah - no computer or emails. A chance to rest and recharge.   

And with that I have come to my 9pm computer cut off time so I will have to share the rest with you at another appropriate time.

What do you want more or less of in 2013? 

I want to take at least one Arthur Elgort-esque, Claudia Schiffer at the lunch table in 'Roman Holiday' type photo. Actually - I just want to shoot a little more like Elgort as an all round rule. 

Will keep you posted. x 

backyard

I love the simplicity of what children actually need. They need love - all the time, food when they're hungry, shelter, rest, company and things to keep their bodies and brains active. 

With nothing but a few bags of ice that needed crushing and each another, those last two were fulfilled perfectly on a recent warm Saturday night in Luella's backyard. What a joy to watch & capture!

Photos: Rachel Kara

Ps. I'll be away in sunny Queensland for the next ten days, which leaves this as the last post of the year. I can almost guarantee I'll be getting more reflective when I'm home as I still am waiting to actually stop and let the year sink in but may it be a glorious end to 2012 for everyone! Who's excited for what's to come?

x

The Flower Market

I like doing nice things with Hannah. We dream a lot about the same kinds of things and when we finally live out these things they never disappoint. Here she retells our last Friday together....

"Last week we went to heaven, and it was only 35 minutes outside of Sydney's centre. Actually, it didn't seem like heaven at first, not with that early morning start, those drooping eyelids, that frenetic rush to throw on a handknit sweater and some strappy sandals while the car waited outside. It didn't seem like heaven without coffee. Maybe that 5 am wake up call wasn't worth it after all, we thought, arms crossed as we crested the highway. And then... No pearly gates, no shining, godly light, no crown of clouds. Just a surly parking attendant demanding $8 and a veritable army of forklifts, speeding across the parking lots laden with a treasury of fresh produce. 

A park was found, a path was navigated, and there we were, standing in the soaring confines of the Sydney Flower Markets. 

It was peonies first. Swelling proudly on the right and the left, more than we had ever seen, shy as a schoolgirl. Pink and purple and the cleanest, purest white, stained with red at the very tip of the bud. Then there were the roses, (oh, the roses!), in every colour imaginable - and some better left unimagineable, blue roses we think not - smelling like turkish delight and Sundays.

Flowers, so many flowers, grouped in buckets and wrapped in plastic or bundled with twine in cardboard boxes, filling the room with secret smiles and quietly disbelieving headshakes. We swooned over the field-like spread of hibiscus, the wily, tough bunches of natives, the stalks of sweetpeas, proud and vain (and why wouldn't you be, if you looked like that?) that were so popular with the bridesmaids and wedding planners sweeping through the warehouse in a cloud of Jo Malone grapefruit. 

It's all too much and we step away, wandering in and out, breathing in greedy gulps of fresh air before resurfacing amidst the flowers, grasping at bunches we want to take home, grasping at everything we find beautiful, which is to say, everything. 

In our imaginations heaven would have been cleaner. There wouldn't have been crushed stalks on the floor or muddy puddles of tepid water or tacky peace-sign emblazoned wrapping paper. But. Perhaps this is what makes heaven truly heaven? The heat, the short tempers, the sellers who wink and whistle. Paradise shouldn't be perfect, think how tiresome that would be? It's enough - so much more than enough - that the flowers are."

Photos: Rachel Kara
Words: Hannah Rose Yee

Eclectic metals

London calls to the smell of red brick, London parks with crocuses and nettles and the salty smell of the Thames at Dagenham.

Orientalist captures the faint memory of an Indian wedding with rose petal garlands, giant cinnamon sticks on beach stalls and the musky smells of the Chinese herbal market.

Royalty is a reminiscence of tea time with a pot of Earl Grey, scones, strawberry jam and the drive home in a '52 Bentley with tatty leather seats.

Silver is probably on the lesser side of my love for metals, but when associated with Early Grey, scones and a '52 Bentley I could be swayed. Either way I'll take all three.

Eclectic by Tom Dixon 

it's almost

 “Each day, with a renewed sense of wonder and curiosity, I would sling the camera over my shoulder and set out to explore a new neighbourhood, chase the the shimmering, golden light reflecting off skyscrapers and observe the comings and goings of beautiful strangers.”

Elize has a magical ability to shoot through a subject or scene and extract the soul of it - to so generously share with you, me, us. I look at her photos of New York and am beautifully reminded of the community spirit that can live in a city, in a season. 

I feel spent of all energy as I wake this humid & dull Monday. I worked through the weekend, hidden from the pleasurable tease of summer whilst everyone basked and boasted with their talk and pictures of sea and sand! So I'm gonna add a ittle light to my morning and browse some more of her wonderful photographs. You should really join me. 

Photos: New York by Elize Strydom

Enough about me

It had been a long day lazing in the cabana with approximately seven and a half minutes of light hanging low in the sky. I had faded zinc plus some strawberry margarita left on my face and overdue-for-a-wash salted hair blowing in the wind...but I suppose I was determined and blissed out enough to excuse the non ideal - yet perfectly ideal - circumstances and shoot a few of my favourite things (to wear at a beach resort) for you.
I have a few requirements; must fold - or roll, depending on your packing style, must breathe, transition from beach to bar, float over the body for many reasons, hopefully not but realistically including sunburn, look as good with my favourite sandals as they do with complimentary white slippers and finally, match my mood. Sunny and light.
Despite my blank stares & expressions the memory of these moments in my mind are all smiles as I madly shouted directions at Mum ("Do NOT GET MY FACE IN THE FRAME!") and she semi obediently snapped away racing against the fading sun.

one/two - LP33.3 'The Covetous' blouse
three - Amy Kaehne' frill front shirt
four - Tigerlilly bikini top, Maille side panel pant
five - Amy Kaehne shift dress
throughout - Petite Grand necklace
locations - Hayman GBR

How to deal

I think once is enough for anyone to feel qualified in giving advice on how to deal with heartache/break. Someone who shares my home seems to be going through it right now so I have been letting my mind wander back a number of years and drawing on that one time, wanting to vocalise what I found helped me mend...but I quickly remembered how much unsolicited advice doesn't help so where better to indulge myself than right here, a self published archive of my life.
I will try and keep it simple.
one. READ. But not just anything, and definitely no psychology or self help books. Read fiction...things that force you to escape the present. Something like; Girl with the Dragon Tattoo - fast paced, addictive, hard assed and (hopefully) pretty removed from the realities of your life.
two. CRY a little. But not too much. Don't stop yourself from partaking in such a beautiful, natural healing therapy but don't go and just swim in sadness with the excuse of catharsis at the ready as a defence. It's a fine balance.
three. WAKE to watch the sunrise. It gets you out of bed. There's something more than metaphorical about watching a new day arrive right before your eyes. It's magic. Weeping may endure the night, but joy comes in the morning. 
four. BE alone. Try and enjoy it. Introverts - this is much easier for us. I thrived on finding I could sit and collage and read blogs and stare at the ocean and walk and potter around my room and sort through old photos and go to op-shops whenever I wanted, for however long I wanted with absolutely no regard for anyone or anything else around me. It's funny how the absence of one person can makes you feel like you are absent from any/all social commitments whatsoever.
five. REMEMBER your dreams. I believe things don't work out when at the end of the day (or month or year or decade) your deepest, inmost, core values and needs aren't aligning with the person you were  with. Which means you may have forgotten a few things about yourself along the way. Get back to that place where you remember you without the influence of another.
six. (re)ESTABLISH your ideas. On all the big things, spirituality was the major one for me. It ended up being the anchor for everything else. Educate yourself, read, research but also listen for the things that cannot be put into words.
seven. GO out with your friends. You may want to lock yourself in a cave at night. Don't. You also may want to go out and not come home. Also a big don't. Go out, have a drank, have fun, try dance even if it's just for a little bit. Be disappointed by the lack of quality men at bars, talk about it with all your other single girlfriends and pact to keep going out together but definitely not for the men.
eight. LOVE again, some day. Don't look for it. Sometimes (if you're a romantic) it's easy to forget there's more of a point to our existence than that intoxicating feeling of being 'in love'. Half the time the feelings a trap anyway so just get on with making your days and self happy.

Say cheese.

And don't take other peoples advice.

xR

Photos: Alison Scarpulla, Feaverish

sitting

I've been away.  The kind of away where you watch the sun rise and set every day, enjoy long and lazy buffet breakfasts, have chilled water delivered to your sun lounge, wear clothing only when dining, let the salt sit in your hair and on your skin even after the light has faded for the day. A holiday where you can pack light (silks, delicate cotton & bikinis as staple) and you need a good book to block the sun from your eyes as you lay and really get lost in another world...probably because you already are in one. The robes are fluffy and your sheets get turned down each night, a fresh pair of slippers are at bed side a candle is lit to set you up for the best chance at a good nights rest.

More on this to come....

xR

Photo:  Maille knit tank, Zimmermann bikini bottoms, Petite Grand necklace worn at sunset at Hayman GBR  
Shot by Mum, landscape by Rachel Kara